Wednesday, January 8, 2014

change in my life/ new goal

So I have made up my mind. I am going to work my butt off and save up enough money to go see my little girl this summer. I feel bad that we don't get to be there this year but seeing them over the summer I think works out best for everyone. Being a school bus driver I have summers off and my little girls mom is a teacher so so does she. The down side to this is I think I need to get another job to make sure I can save up the money in time. Also that means no fair for me this summer (upside to that I won't eat all that fair food) but that's ok, all I did is waste my money there any ways. So I guess wish me luck cause I'm going to need it. I might end up working 7 days a week and be dead tired but it will all be worth it if we get to see my little girl and her parents this year. Rhylin needs to spend time getting to know his sissy that he can identify in pictures now. I love that he knows who his sissy is and that he can't wait to see her as well.

Saturday, January 4, 2014

update on my crazy life

So it has been a very long time since I have been on here. To be honest I pretty much forgot about this. Well seeing how the last time I was on here I was pregnant with my son who is now 2 there is a lot of updating to do. So I had my son and that was a no fun labor, being induced sucked so much but at least he came out fine, for the most part. I am a single mom now and yes some days suck and others are great. I work as a school bus driver and get to bring my son with me and he loves riding the bus. I've made new friends and lost others over the years. Been out with only 1 guy since my ex, who left me pregnant hot msrried to another girl and can't seem to pay child support, but this guy is alright. He is very nice to me but I think we are just better off as good friends. I've gone to visit my other family once since my sons birth but it was an amazing time that we all had. I hope to visit them durring the summer so we have more time to hang out. I've been going to church when I can and have a calling to help out in nursery. I think this was a great calling for me. It has been trying at times but has helped me so much with my patience and how to understand my child more. It also has helped him, with him being an only child right now he needs a way to learn how to share and play with others and how to socialize. I love the ward I'm in right now. Everyone is so welcomming and friendly. I hate to say it but a few weeks ago my son locked me out of the car after church and so many families were out there in the cold helping me to try and get into my car, thankfuly my son was nice and warm with it running and all. Lol. I think with this gap of bloging has been good though. When I look back on what has happened over the past couple years I remember a couple bad things but a lot of good. I have had mybtrails and tribulations but have grown and learned from them. Everything that has happened to me has made me stronger and better. The lord works in his own way and in the end we see why. I am thankful for all the good and bad times. Mainly for my ex. I now know I don't always need a man in my life to be happy. I am fine with being single, but I am never truely alone. I will always have the lord and my son. And I feel I need to state this. I was still very sad with being pregnant and then not having the baby there to care for so I did pretty much make myself get pregnant. I had a hole inside that I could fill. I look back and know I was being selfish but at the same time I'm happy I did cause my son is everything to me and after being pregnant twice I have learned so much. Anyways, mine and addis birthdays are comming up. I hope she gets the presents in time. She is getting so big and growing up so fast. She will be turning 4 and my son just turned 2 a few months ago. How time flies. She is such an amazinbg little girl and it is because of her amazing, wonderful, in my eyes near perfect parents. I am so grateful for being able to have them in my life and to raise the little girl I loved but could not take care for. Oh and I almost forgot cause I mentioned it in my last blog. We did find out about the FOP, we found out the day I had Rhyming. She does have it, but I'm glad that she is not letting it define her. She hasn't had another accident so its only the one right now. I do hate that she can't use her one knee at all but at least that is all and its not worse. To anyone that is still reading thank you for careing to follow through to see how thigns are going and I will try and write more.